Friday, May 11, 2012

Just so we're on the same page

I believe when someone jumps to conclusions, one has not asked the person for explanation.  I know that I have been guilty of that at times.

I feel an explanation needs to be made.  I am not asking to be "bailed out" of my personal debt.  I've lived paycheck to paycheck for as long as I can remember.  If I had savings, trust me, I'd use it.  Since discovering that God is indeed calling me back to religious life, I've been on a very strict budget to pay off my personal debt myself.  If I am able to sell my minivan for $8400, I'll be able to use the overage ($4600) to pay off most of the personal debt I'll have remaining.  I've been paying about $500-600 out of every paycheck towards my personal debt, starting this coming pay period $750 (which coincidentally is 67% of my paycheck).  Trust me, if I had the time to have gotten a second job, I would have.  My other bills include a car payment, cell phone bill, student loan payment, rent, groceries, gas, and car insurance.

Speaking of a cell phone bill.  I have not had another way to communicate except through my cell phone.  And, yes, I own an Iphone.  But, let's explain that.  I was up for an upgrade last November.  Yes, I could have kept my old phone.  However, every day something new was breaking on it, and it was going to die.  I decided that it was easier to upgrade for FREE, and when the time came, to sell the phone for the amount of the early termination fee ($290) instead of purchasing a brand new phone and plan through another carrier.

I've read the comments on a blog who has posted my vocation story.  There is a commenter who has commented that they believe I am making "blythe appeals for help to pay debts incurred for the newest Kindle Fire, camcorder, webcam, camera, iPhone, iPod, and many other expensive gadgets".

Just so we are on the same page here, let's go down the list above to see what was given to me as a gift and what  I've purchased:

  • Kindle Fire ~ Christmas present that I didn't ask for, and didn't know what it was until they told me
  • Camcorder ~ Christmas present
  • Webcam ~ purchased with credit through paid radio surveys
  • Camera ~ purchased with Target gift cards
  • iPhone ~ see explanation above
  • iPod ~ purchased with gift cards
  • GoGroove ~ purchased with credit through paid radio surveys
  • ReliOn Blood Pressure Monitor ~ I bought it to maintain normal blood pressure, it was originally $29
  • iHome ~ purchased with gift cards
  • Pink Bluetooth ~ I purchased on clearance more than 3 years ago (b4 I realized God was calling me back)
  • Black bluetooth ~ purchased with gift cards before I entered the 1st time
  • Messenger bag ~ I purchased on clearance clearance more than 3 years ago (b4 I realized God was calling me back)
  • Reisenthel Carrybag ~ Christmas present
  • Tablemate II ~ I purchased more than 3 years ago (b4 I realized God was calling me back)

Why is it wrong of me to sell all that I have to pay off my personal debt in order to enter religious life?
I still have a job.  And, hopefully, God-willing, through my very strict budget, the selling off of ALL that I have, and the kindness of others (if they so desire), then I will enter in June 2012.

And, what is wrong with asking the saints to pray for me?  Or to ask God to provide?  I'm not asking Him to have money rain from the sky, but to provide me with all that I need to pay off this debt!  Whether that be through my own money or gifts from others.

May God Bless Each and Everyone of You who passes by here!  May you truly understand the plan that God has for each of you.  I love the road that He has me on, for it leads me to Him, and to Heaven!


Anonymous said...

Have you posted your items for sale on EBay? You may have a wider audience of potential buyers than via your FB page.

Good luck to you!

Deepa said...

I do have two items on craigslist. And, working on more.
Ebay, honestly, confuses me. But, I'll look into it again.
thanks for the suggestion.

Julie M. said...

Hi Deepa - You know I've been a supporter of your vocation for a long time, and yet I was a little surprised myself to see all of the items listed on your FB page. I appreciate all of your explanations and think they make sense.

I think the lesson to be learned here is that when you make yourself out to be a somewhat public figure, asking for prayers and financial support, it just naturally follows that you are going to be under greater scrutiny. It's the same sentiment that causes people to look into the tax records of presidential candidates. If other would-be postulants out there are reading your blog, they should take away the message of needing to be as transparent as possible to avoid misunderstandings.

I wouldn't worry too much. I think you are doing God's will, and you will make it to the monastery. Maybe it won't be on the timetable you hoped for, but you'll get there. Be assured that my prayers are still with you!

MD said...

Why should you have to explain yourself to anyone? If you were a bride to be in the earthly sense, no one would think it wrong if you sought to sell you car, or anything else, to raise funds for your life with your spouse. You should not have to justify the sale of your gadgets, any more than you should have to justify the decision to enter a convent. I have followed this blog and it does not appear to me that you ever actually solicited for funds. Rather, you gently reminded the reader of your plans. There is a huge difference between the two. Please do not let the opinions of others dim your joy at this special time.